Star-Studded Limericks about Astronomy

Before there were vaccines, before there were engines, before there was farming, there was astronomy. And there was poetry. The study of the stars and the transmission of stories through the music of language. So what could be more natural than a series of limericks about astronomy?

Few things in life are more poetic than the motion of the planets and stars. They turn in perfect rhythm, undisturbed by the whims and fancies of mere mortals. We gaze at them from distances measured in light years, and yet the constellations of Orion and the Big Bear remain our constant companions.

For thousands of years, hunters, farmers and sailors have relied on the motions of the heavens to foretell the future and provide directions. Even in a year as helter-skelter as 2020, we can still count on the stars to put a dependable twinkle in the night sky.

And now, more than ever, we need a few limericks to make it all a bit easier to swallow.

Limericks for the heavens

     Sea Worthy
     The fishermen call on me now and again
     Asking me whither this sailor has been
               For six weeks at sea
               Just my parrot and me
     We followed the stars and the currents within

     Perseids 2020
     There’s meteors coming according to NASA
     Descending all evening from here to Alaska
               But don’t go out looting
               When stars begin shooting
     The last thing we need is another disasta

Limericks in space

From the dawn of time to the present day, the idea of space travel has never failed to mesmerize us. Communication with the stars, with other worlds, it’s a fantasy we visit each and every night. Whether we approach it from a romantic sensibility, or with a mathematical passion, it’s all unthinkably fascinating.

     Doppler Effect
     There’s a lightwave that changes by strange hocus pocus
     A photon that comes from a faraway locus
               The phase shift of color
               Makes red stars glow duller
     As starlight approaches and comes into focus

     Star Struck
     Rotation of planets brings stars into view
     A glimmer of twilight enlivens the dew
               And half a day later
               The darkness grows greater
     Though dazzled by Venus I’d rather see you

     Canis Major
     On the belt of Orion three kings in a row
     Leading us east to a star that hangs low
               Look out for Sirius
               Bright and mysterious
     And only the wise men who follow shall know

     Wind Me Up
     Autonomous bodies belonging to one
     Spinning in circles like clocks on the run
               A system in action
               Propelled by attraction
     And I’ll be your planet if you’ll be my sun

     The Schwarzschild Radius
     There are places in space where the laws are suspended
     Where light disappears and the time is upended
             Best keep your eyes on
             The event horizon
     ‘Cause falling below it is not recommended

Limericks under a bad star

The word “disaster” comes from the Greek, meaning “bad star”. And sometimes it’s reassuring when we can blame our personal catastrophes on an unfavorable arrangement of heavenly bodies. Case and point: Mercury retrograde.

     Mercury Mayhem
     Retrograde renders me wrinkled and wrecked
     No one moves forward and nothing’s correct
               A period of panic
               Malfunctions and static
     Till the planets and orbits have all gone direct

     Out of this world
     There are times when the planets run perfectly
     And days when they orbit un-circley
               So when data gets lost
               Or your switchboard gets crossed
     We can blame all our woes upon Mercury

Traditionally tasteless

Every so often, I have to throw in a limerick of the more unsavory flavor. So, turn back now if you’re easily offended.

     Student Body
     There’s a novice I know with an inkling of class
     Though she ought to have failed I allowed her to pass
               By night she would cram
               For her oral exam
     And by day the headmaster would study her astronomy homework

Further Reading

If you enjoyed these stellar limericks about astronomy, please consider sharing the post or subscribing to the blog. You might also want to check out some of these popular articles:

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• Serious Limericks: There once was an unsmiling rhymer