9 Penetrating Limericks about Dostoyevsky

Literary scholars generally agree that Dostoyevsky was one of the greatest novelists who ever lived. High school students may be skeptical of that assessment. But professors of literature and philosophy will opine on the Russian master’s brilliant characterizations and psychological dilemmas until the Bolsheviks come home.

Upon first reading, you may not fall in love with his convoluted, murder-laden storylines, nor his exuberant exaltations of Russian orthodoxy or his polemical caricatures of nihilistic liberalism. Indeed, it’s usually more than enough work just keeping track of the characters with their multiple names, patronymics and diminutives.

In most cases, you’ll probably be better off tackling Dostoyevsky’s great works with the aid of a helpful study guide or a knowledgeable mentor. The secondary and tertiary literature pertaining to The Brothers Karamazov, Crime & Punishment and The Idiot is voluminous.

But for best results, a quick series of limericks about Dostoyevsky can jump-start your imagination and make you more aware of the most salient themes in what are arguably the greatest books of all time. (And don’t worry, no spoiler alerts.)

Limericks about Dostoyevsky and his masterworks

Fyodor Dostoyevsky
There’s a grandiose gambler who suffers from seizures
His opus consisted of several crowd pleasers
And painstaking students
Exhibit their prudence
Dissecting his novels with scalpels and tweezers

Notes from Underground
There’s a man underground with a chronic disease
Unable to cope with the world that he sees
For humans and vermin
Must act as determined
But the obstinate hero downstairs disagrees

Crime & Punishment
Enter Raskolnikov, proud and pathetic
He stars in a story profane and prophetic
Possessed by delusion
And moral confusion
He paces the room like a peripatetic

Guilt & Bewilderment
There’s a Russian who suffers from mental dysfunction
Arrived at a morally perilous junction
His mind in a fever
He strikes with a cleaver
And now he’s perturbed by a pound of compunction

Limericks about The Brothers Karamazov

The Onion Parable (Brothers Karamazov)
There’s a miserly woman with morals impaired
Who was granted the chance for her soul to be spared
Being drawn from the lake
She squirmed like a snake
As she clung to the onion so lusciously layered

The Grand Inquisitor (Brothers Karamazov)
The Inquisitor presses God’s feet to the fire:
You promised salvation — I call you a liar
Your freedom comes first
But hunger and thirst
Are permitted to flourish like pain and desire

Alexei Fyodorovich Karamazov (Brothers Karamazov)
Christ-like Alyosha the youngest of four
He learns from the elder behind the next door
All things are connected
When souls are inspected
We’re all brothers’ keepers but who’s keeping score?

Limericks about The Idiot

The Idiot
The salons of St. Petersburg filled with façades
Prince Myshkin takes chances but what are the odds?
Sincere to a fault
And they take it with salt
So the savior looks foolish and no one applauds

The Foolish Prince
When Christ comes again he’ll be laughed out of town
With a message of love and the face of a clown
He’s perfectly kind
But so unrefined
And that’ll be the day when the kingdom comes down